i can't make paragraphs =Pp

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another.

Galatians 5:22-26

"Each is a different aspect of Christlikeness. In the Gospels, we see how Christ exemplified these virtues. Now He wants to produce them in our hearts—in what we say, how we think, and how we respond to life (John 15:1-4)".

if i had these characteristics in me... you know what? i want them.

which, conversely also means that my flesh has to die. crucified, at that.

sigh. it would hurt like... the whole past year, and then some, i'm guessing. which is kind of unnverving. oh but look what i pasted on gayle's blog yesterday:

Whenever God takes us through the land of affliction, He will do two things through that affliction:

1) He will bring such healing that we will be able to forget the pain, and

2) He will make us fruitful from the painful experiences.

there's always hope for us who believe in Christ. Always. with reality as it is, you can't ask for more than that. a hope that stands the test of time, that is proven, that is independent of circumstance.

i think i'm... a really mishapen person. i have like all these issues and pasts and falsities and downright arrogance, which makes me think of a doll-like figure that has layers and layers of steamed dough draped around it, unevenly; i'm a michelin doll gone horrifically wrong.

so. after all that reflection. i reiterate: i want to be fruit. i want to be loving, joyful, in peace, longsuffering, gentle, good, faithful, meek, temperant.

(okay everyone get ready to see the posts for the next year, HAH)

God works in mud.

from crazy love book:

Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what's happening in our lives.

Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or our tight grip of control.

it's just difficult. to see suffering in the world.

on food

sell the vatican! or our church.

i know i have that megahuge uni loan to pay off, and that people who work on social issues are hardly ever rich, and that oswald chambers really doesn't like people who tell God they wanna do this this this, but i'm going to stick my neck out and tell God: God, I really wanna get my hands dirty. pronto. in Your time, and in Your way, and without me being put behind bars for neglecting that ridiculous sum of money. ahhh! amen.

Be His strength in your arm/His love in your soul

Oswalds Chambers on heartbreak, emphasis mine:

Why shouldn’t we experience heartbreak? Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son. Most of us collapse at the first grip of pain. We sit down at the door of God’s purpose and enter a slow death through self-pity. And all the so-called Christian sympathy of others helps us to our deathbed. But God will not. He comes with the grip of the pierced hand of His Son, as if to say, "Enter into fellowship with Me; arise and shine." If God can accomplish His purposes in this world through a broken heart, then why not thank Him for breaking yours?