byy the way

Today, we went to choose the picture for our family portrait, my mom and I. There were maybe fifteen shots to choose from, 3R and glossy. And oh, so pretty. There were four that I liked just about equally, and my mom was so proud of how handsome nat has become. And he did, you know. Look handsome. Now that the childhood fats have gone, he at fifteen has my father's high cheekbones and shaped jaw. His hair was swept away to the side, and he has my father's sharp nose. I need here to add that I did his hair. I'm quite proud of that. In other photos he didn't smile, all brooding and unscrutable, and my mom kept saying he's saki; at one point she matter-of-factly said "he's perfect". I do believe it's the first time she's said that. I wonder how my brother will look at twenty-one. Seems like he got our parents' best features. Even has my mom's eyelashes. Any one sense discrimination here?

well.

After that we made our way to tea, with satay and coconuts. Strange bedfellows in my tummy, but nonetheless fitting. and sumptious. Mom was dreaming happily about my wedding album, and her future son-in-law (who, she has decided, must take her around the world). I mentioned how al told me last night that "by right, by Right ah, the guy should pay for the wedding expenses. it's like to prove his ability to take care of you". I like the sound of that, but it seems to me if I wait for the guy to save up I'll have to get married at forty. But my mom thinks it shouldn't be too hard for the guy to pay and well, she's the one with the wedding band on her finger so I'll leave it as that for now. For now.

One last thing. I was suddenly struck by what my brother said the other day, when we were talking about jon. I thought he'd forgotten him, was too young when jon and I were close but

"yeah of course I do. I liked him".

So he remembers jon, and as I was thinking another thought joined this one, how my mom always reminds me that her son-in-law must love my brother too. And in this regard only jon ever fulfilled it, and freely at that. He was good to my brother, taking him out and willingly spending time with him. I never knew how much it meant to me till now.
My brother means a lot to me.