i am [a skeptic] @ youth.sg

so wayne prodded me onto entering some blog publicity contest. While flattered, I think not.

For one, the word blog has always bothered me. It is short, and frivolous. The presence of the letter "o" in the word signifies a hollowness [hollowness expresses my sentiments beautifully. The essence of emptiness has two "o"s in it] that I do not much care for. The initial plosive consonant is blunt, and unsophisticated. I am a word snob. These things irk me. and then the fact that blog sounds suspiciously close to the words bog and booger should say something. Bogs are the summation of all things rejected, of countless permutations and combinations of mud, slime and every shade of the worst brown. Musty, decomposing, menstrual rusty-brown. A booger is the greenyellowblackstickyslightlysalty uhu glue blob your nasal cavity manufactures. We have a factory in two dark holes, ladies and gentlemen. What might your rate of productivity be hmmm. In any case, denial or confession, the uncomfortable revelation that blogs hobnob with bogs and boogers is entirely distasteful. Or perhaps, exciting. One must always allow for perspective, I suppose.

well but if mirco-practical criticism persuades you not, let me resign myself to logic and present more palatable offerings. First, the nature of this contest is such that it panders to the masses. Mine are whimscial fantasies, dream-thoughts that colour green-blue and eyes become a pool of black holes. Because like the paravan in roy's novel, whose name I still cannot remember, I have learnt to confidently assure the world that there are no such things in the world as black cats; they are black holes in the shapes of cats. No black cat-shaped hole in the world however, will be able to connect my word wanderings with the rest of the viewers in the internet world. Black holes are the antithesis of normalcy. How many will appreciate my conversations with the walrus and the carpenter? A competition that calls for supporting votes will not be won by reflections such as mine. Cloudy, self-willed and somewhat petulant.
And then there's the issue of publicity and vulnerability. My words are created for a certain audience, and for all manner of men [and women] to intrude and trespass, I think that would create chaos in the delicate feather wings I have effortfullly balanced. The comos, you know. Let's see, what else.

I've heard of many celebrity b[lo]oggers and seen them side by side, against a wall, in loud solid colours in various heights in various states of undress [cloth] and coveredupness [makeup]. Of brick walls they loll against, as if they and their opinions were equally solid. grin confidently at the glass lens you call a camera, smirk charmingly as if you know how. And you do. The art of speaking isn't confined to the audio, oh no. The print has found its voice, it tells you things not from sound waves. Your re-presented self tells readers that you, the celebrity b[lo]ogger, are worth listening to. because. you won a singing competition. because you got married and then didn't. because your smile beats the hearts of boyish folly. because you're an editor at the straits times and write about supposed metrosexual [read: cool beans] issues. Sorry nicholas fang. I've never read the rest of the stomp blogger's blogs. But I used to read your columns, you mused about life and girls and I could never quite connect. I've heard it said that stomp is merely straits times' frantic effort to be on par with mrbrown and his contemporaries. and you see. it was mrbrown and friends that posted photos of the multitudes at the opposition parties rallies, not you. You showed unglamourous close-ups of their leaders looking tired and shabby. Rather too unfair, don't you think. How lean you on the tightrope of news productions hmmm. Your pole of news values with which you balance, how is it fashioned. In any case, it was on mrbrown's website that I first saw behind the brick wall. Aye, that brick wall you lean against. Does it show your strength, or have you hidden issues from us, ala the cask of amontillado. In any case in any case. Oh, by the way. Thank you for your two tickets to the singapore-leg of the tiger cup finals; I had a whole lot of fun.

Got you this far, virgin reader? Then I am impressed. and drained. Rarely have I introspected so long, and so much into my bias and assumptions. I am prejudiced, indeed. Yet I hope to have convinced you [and my dear friend wayne who believes in me] as to why I am a skeptic @ youth.sg.