1. Who is your best girl friend(s)?
al, boo, gayle, hann, erica, pea, etc.
2. If someone were to tell you they like you right now, would you care?
yeah
3. Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
no
4. Where did you last sleep other than your house?
at the foos
5. Do you have a best friend?
Yea
6. Do you smoke?
Nah
7. Do you remember what you were like when you were a kid?
awkward
8. Can you vote for the next election?
Yea
9. What are you listening to?
kids playing downstairs; happy voices
10. When will your next kiss be?
dunno
11. Who do you want to see right now?
john joy danny
12. Ever have a sleepover with the opposite sex?
Yea
13. When did your last hug take place?
few days ago
14. Do you date smart people?
yeah
15. Where were you at 2:02pm this afternoon?
not yet, but i will be with terence and joy to see danny the playmaker :)
16. What does the last text in your phone says?
me to joy: pylbr at too haha laters <3
17. Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?
yeah
18. Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?
Yea
19. Who did you last eat with?
mmm. ag people i guess.
20. Do you text alot?
Yea
21. How old will you be in 13 months?
23
22. When is the last time you tattooed?
Nah
23. If you like that person will you talk about your feelings or hide them?
hide
24. Do you wear glasses?
yeah
25. What are you looking forward to in the next month?
in the month itself? i really dunno man. after the month maybe.
26. Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
who says i like anyone
27. What color shirt are you wearing?
white
28. Do you have a reason to smile right now?
i always will, even if i don't
29. If you won a lot of money on the lottery, what would you buy first ?
a house
30. Who was the last person of the opposite sex you had a conversation with? What was it about?
john, and aik, one on msn one on phone. not telling.
31. Who was driving the last car you were in?
i forgot his name. friend's friend. he had braces though, nice.
32. Who was the last person that called you?
haha some true yoga shite
33. What are you craving right now?
shashimi? dunno random whack
34. What if you married the last person you kissed?
he didn't want to marry me
35. What are you excited about?
happy, sparkly, pretty, fun stuff.
dresses, balloons, flowers, ribbons, various accessories earrings, bracelets etc. ya i know i'm such a kid okay.
36. Ever kissed your number 1 on facebook?
??
37. When was the last time you cried? And why?
last night
38. Ever kissed someone who's name starts with an A?
i... don't think so.
39. Is there one person who can make you feel better no matter what?
i think so
40. Last person you hugged?
can't remember, keep thinking it's sarah/mabel when i know it's not
41. What were you doing at 2:00 am last night?
sleeping
42. Have you cried today?
no
43. What bed did you sleep in last night?
mine
44. Are you currently frustrated with a girl/guy?
not like i remember such things
45. Ever talked to someone that was high?
Yea.
46. Does it snow where you live?
Never. yay.
47. When is the next time you will see your grandma?
dunno
48. Have you kissed or hugged someone today ?
no
49. Will you be married in the next two years ?
Haha you and i wish
50. Have you ever wanted someone you thought that you couldn't have?
yeah
51. Are you in a relationship, single, complicated, married, or engaged?
single
52. How have you felt today ?
a little quieter, i guess
53. Do you like your name?
yeah
54. Are you happy at the moment?
refer to earlier related question about smiling
55. What were you doing at 10:00pm last night ?
online/texting i guess
56. Last person who drove you somewhere(besides your parents) ?
mabel
57. Ever kissed someone in a closet?
huh no
58. Do you live alone ?
sometimes
59. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex that you can talk to?
Duh
60. Are you crazy ?
i don't think so
61. Who was the last person to call you babe?
many people call me babe. becky, probably
62. How has this past week been for you?
63. Last thing you drank ?
water
64. Do you believe that every thing happens for a reason?
yea
65. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
Dontknow
66. If you were reincarnated as a sea creature, what would you want to be?
maybe a deep sea dweller :)
67. What do you normally order when you're at McDonald's?
sundae i guess. i love the fugde. yay.
68. Last book you read?
erm. hip to be square, some chick lit thing la.
69. Describe your mood.
getting a bit impatient with these questions
70. Describe the last time you were injured?
scratches i guess, from ulty training
71. Of all your friends, who would you want to be stuck in a well with?
need to meet people, no time to answer
72. Rock concert or symphony?
Depends
73. Do you like taking the MRT?
nope
74. If you could only use a form of transportation,
bus
75. Whats your favorite kind of cake?
(good) chocolate
76. Look 20 degrees to your left, what do you see?
my dresses. haha.
77. Do you untie your shoes when you take it off?
Nah
78. Do you buy your own groceries?
Nah
79. What's your favorite fruit?
DURIAN
80. Do you like running long distances?
not anymore
81. Have you ever eaten snow?
No
82. What color are your bedsheets?
dark red base, with mellow yellow tribalish lines. i like.
83. Do you hate someone very badly at this moment?
No
84. Do you watch Spongebob?
ew no
85. What temperature is it outside right now?
dunno
86. Do you consider yourself smart?
haha in which sense
87. How many piercings do you have?
HAHA. ermmmm 7.
88. What language do you speak at home?
english
89. How do you feel about your family?
blessed
90. What time did you go to bed yesterday?
1?
91. What CD is currently in your CD player?
nothing
92. What do you want for Christmas this year?
a grown up sensible brother please
93. Favorite ice-cream?
island creamy/daily scoop flavours
94. What's the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name?
racher
95. Lastly, whats your favorite color?
i want to paint my parts of my room
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
we still have oil in russia to discover
be better, be well again. be affectionate, be smiling once more. tell me about it, i'm waiting for your letter.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
"Hello, lemon," I said. I don't know why. Arbitrary words for a love as certain and clear and sweet as sunlight. Hello peach, hello honey, hello stran
ger, hello you.
three more books borrowed, after three books returned. what is it about my recent ravenings, devouring swamps, masses of words one page after another. i finished my obligatory chick lit text in a few hours, unexpectedly enjoying the author's wit (she's a humour columnist, apparently. how are these people assembled; they know what it takes to make me laugh), and now i sit absent-mindedly reading it a second time, slower. a times-two book in a single day.
crack up, without a doubt.
but my degeneration into the bespectacled world is so absolute, so obsessive, that i wonder. am i reclaiming an abandoned self i once had, then let loose to wander around the earth? maybe that's how ghosts are made, our thrown away selves still living but pushed away by one's physical body, so that they, pale wisps, while their way around the planets, waiting, and perhaps they glow faintly in moonlight. she walks like summer and talks like rain/reminding me there's a time to change/yeah yeah yeah. seems like i've got drops of jupiter, after all.
three more books borrowed, after three books returned. what is it about my recent ravenings, devouring swamps, masses of words one page after another. i finished my obligatory chick lit text in a few hours, unexpectedly enjoying the author's wit (she's a humour columnist, apparently. how are these people assembled; they know what it takes to make me laugh), and now i sit absent-mindedly reading it a second time, slower. a times-two book in a single day.
Most women, and i think i can generalize here, will put off buying a new bra until their straps disintegrate, and even then they might improvise for a while. Wear sweatshirts, for instance, or simply not leave the house. This is because bra shopping is exceedingly dull. What are bras, if not bland, ineffectual necessities tarted up with an array of sewn-on daisies? The most timid fashion statment i have ever known is the teensy, superfluous bow at the cleavage of my bra, intended to suggest... I don't know what. A certain hypermodest girlish femininity. 'Hey, naughty boy, look at me in my sagging, fraying, beige-coloured, oversized bra. Bet ya didn't notice the bow'
crack up, without a doubt.
but my degeneration into the bespectacled world is so absolute, so obsessive, that i wonder. am i reclaiming an abandoned self i once had, then let loose to wander around the earth? maybe that's how ghosts are made, our thrown away selves still living but pushed away by one's physical body, so that they, pale wisps, while their way around the planets, waiting, and perhaps they glow faintly in moonlight. she walks like summer and talks like rain/reminding me there's a time to change/yeah yeah yeah. seems like i've got drops of jupiter, after all.
I thought i could introduce him to me newly... Read this, this is a book i'm touched by; listen to the music i like; notice, on my dresser, letters from people who love me. These are the gaps to be filled to rejoin us completely. ...
We got ahead of the guide, leaving his flashlight behind. Evan strode faster than I, and all at once I lost him in the shadowy pitch of an underpass between stalagmite and cavern wall. After a silence, he whistled, but it echoed and came from everywhere. There was a fork to the trail, I didn't know which path he'd taken. And I thought: This is where we'll always be. Ex-lovers navigating through darkness like bats do, guided by emotinoal echoes, now sensing, now losing the warmth.
Monday, March 09, 2009
another quiz! haha :)
Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
Saturday, March 07, 2009
okay i shall go sleep now
i'm sleepy, i went to bed before six today but woke up at tenish and just ate two bowls of very filled chowder (more stew than soup) so i'm very bloated and full and even though i think i could go back and sleep again i am waiting this expansion off.
i got 15 out of 20 for my test which park gave back today, not bad not bad for 2 days of study and i don't mind that the dude in front of ky and i got 18/20, he probably mugged for it and derseved it anyway. even if he didn't and is naturally brilliant, i don't care either. i'm not quarrelling or comparing.
i'm going to do a quiz! :)
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
nope
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
long ago
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
i don't mind it, i have a couple i switch from now and then actually, depending on my mood
4. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
i think so. as in, honestly speaking. i would probably appear cheerful and caring to my another person self. quite an attractive combi, detachedly speaking. (but okay la i can say all this because this place is locked up and i KNOW the people who read this! and i know you guys know me :) )
5. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
i try to stop practising it. tell myself i'm bad at it and stuff. i do believe me.
6. HOW DO YOU WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE IN A COUPLE OF YEARS? (REALISTICALLY PLEASE)
a couple? i'd have graduated by then.... travelling lor.
7. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
yeah
8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
honeystars!
9. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
nope
10. WOULD YOU MOVE AGAIN?
i want to. the whole travelling thing, remember
11. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
hrmm. their faces probably. but that's really very extremely quickly replaced by judgements on all their other aspects. i'm unfortunately quite judgemental until i actually know the person, then i don't care.
12. RED OR PINK?
red. i like red. i want a red dress.
13. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
my snootiness.
14. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
nz
15. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
tricky. hmmm. i'll come back and answer this later, hopefully i remember.
oh yes, i did remember to come back. yeah i have my answer. i miss those who are away from me. especially gina. i miss gina the most.
16. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
well if you do, i'll know you read my blog! haha
17. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
black fbts and i'm in bed so no shoes
18. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
the fan
19. WHAT ANNOYS YOU THE MOST?
people who don't care about poverty, or are lazy about it
20. FAVORITE SMELL?
hugo :) i have a blog post about it somewhere. too bad blogspot doesn't have the search thing.
21. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
phone? hrmm. aik, apparently. yesterday. can't remember what about though
22. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
no one did :)
23. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
not one favourite
24. HAIR COLOR?
black
25. EYE COLOR?
i dunno leh
26. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAJOR REGRETS?
yes
27. FAVORITE FOOD?
singaporean
28. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
HAPPY
29. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED, AND WITH WHOM?
slumdog with my brother. yay.
30. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
sec sch pe shirt so worn it's practically trans
31. SUMMER OR WINTER?
SUMMER. i HATE winter.
32. HUGS OR KISSES?
oh. uh. hugs, probably. i have my reasons.
33. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
no one, probably.
34. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
duh
35. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
why does this question assume singularity?
Currently: Surprised by Hope (N.T Wright), Essays by Amy Tan, Mister God this is Anna by Fynn, and i just finished The Life God blesses (Gordon Macdonald), and reread Dracula (Bram Stoker) over the past two nights. oh, and Terry Prachet's Carpe Jugglum.
36. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
my finger?
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
i didn't.
38.WHAT LITTLE THING MAKES YOU HAPPY?
quality time. i'm a very quality time person. leave me alone, and i'll feel sad.
unless i'm busy and don't have time for you.
39. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
beatles
40. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
india? either that, or new zealand
41. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
probably
42. WHERE WERE U BORN?
kk
43. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
if anyone answers this, it would be gratifying yes
44. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
wouldn't you like to know
i got 15 out of 20 for my test which park gave back today, not bad not bad for 2 days of study and i don't mind that the dude in front of ky and i got 18/20, he probably mugged for it and derseved it anyway. even if he didn't and is naturally brilliant, i don't care either. i'm not quarrelling or comparing.
i'm going to do a quiz! :)
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
nope
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
long ago
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
i don't mind it, i have a couple i switch from now and then actually, depending on my mood
4. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
i think so. as in, honestly speaking. i would probably appear cheerful and caring to my another person self. quite an attractive combi, detachedly speaking. (but okay la i can say all this because this place is locked up and i KNOW the people who read this! and i know you guys know me :) )
5. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
i try to stop practising it. tell myself i'm bad at it and stuff. i do believe me.
6. HOW DO YOU WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE IN A COUPLE OF YEARS? (REALISTICALLY PLEASE)
a couple? i'd have graduated by then.... travelling lor.
7. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
yeah
8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
honeystars!
9. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
nope
10. WOULD YOU MOVE AGAIN?
i want to. the whole travelling thing, remember
11. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
hrmm. their faces probably. but that's really very extremely quickly replaced by judgements on all their other aspects. i'm unfortunately quite judgemental until i actually know the person, then i don't care.
12. RED OR PINK?
red. i like red. i want a red dress.
13. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
my snootiness.
14. WHAT DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
nz
15. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
tricky. hmmm. i'll come back and answer this later, hopefully i remember.
oh yes, i did remember to come back. yeah i have my answer. i miss those who are away from me. especially gina. i miss gina the most.
16. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
well if you do, i'll know you read my blog! haha
17. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
black fbts and i'm in bed so no shoes
18. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
the fan
19. WHAT ANNOYS YOU THE MOST?
people who don't care about poverty, or are lazy about it
20. FAVORITE SMELL?
hugo :) i have a blog post about it somewhere. too bad blogspot doesn't have the search thing.
21. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
phone? hrmm. aik, apparently. yesterday. can't remember what about though
22. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
no one did :)
23. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
not one favourite
24. HAIR COLOR?
black
25. EYE COLOR?
i dunno leh
26. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAJOR REGRETS?
yes
27. FAVORITE FOOD?
singaporean
28. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
HAPPY
29. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED, AND WITH WHOM?
slumdog with my brother. yay.
30. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
sec sch pe shirt so worn it's practically trans
31. SUMMER OR WINTER?
SUMMER. i HATE winter.
32. HUGS OR KISSES?
oh. uh. hugs, probably. i have my reasons.
33. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
no one, probably.
34. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
duh
35. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
why does this question assume singularity?
Currently: Surprised by Hope (N.T Wright), Essays by Amy Tan, Mister God this is Anna by Fynn, and i just finished The Life God blesses (Gordon Macdonald), and reread Dracula (Bram Stoker) over the past two nights. oh, and Terry Prachet's Carpe Jugglum.
36. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
my finger?
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
i didn't.
38.WHAT LITTLE THING MAKES YOU HAPPY?
quality time. i'm a very quality time person. leave me alone, and i'll feel sad.
unless i'm busy and don't have time for you.
39. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
beatles
40. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
india? either that, or new zealand
41. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
probably
42. WHERE WERE U BORN?
kk
43. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
if anyone answers this, it would be gratifying yes
44. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
wouldn't you like to know
Thursday, March 05, 2009
where i try to sound intellectual.
restless. restless.
rachel would like to be:
1. more intellectual. as in, making use of it, i suppose, since i already have it it's just hidden underneath and i don't care to bring it out all that often. unless there's like some idiot (usually guy) in class trying to pose all brilliant and insightful and... generally coming off SMARMY. caterpillar goo and mashed up fat caterpillar legs for brain stuffing. then yeah, i bother using my smarts. but then again not really, i usually content myself with many mutterings in my (hidden) intellectual brain. like how i called said idiot caterpillar goo mashed up fat brain. well anyway i do like intelligence, you know, girls who use it turn me on. HAHAHHAHAA.
2. provocative. the last above sentence was for my best friend, who very firmly believes that homosexuality is Not For Rachel. but no, really, it's true. i guess i haven't seen many intelligent guys (or blogs i suppose since that's where i get my ideas from: smart girl = writes smart/about smart stuff like her essays and ideas and stuff like that); the smart ones are girls. so i have no choice but to admire it in girls right? okay okay. i shall narrow my definition. i like people who genuinely enjoy intellect/using it, and it shows in their conversation and personal writings. do i make sense? okay la evidently i'm not smart after all. rachel should just face her bimbotic self because that's the real her right. YOU KNOW I'M QUOTING FROM YOU. because i get this quite a lot. okay my point's been totally lost ggxx ttm. (epic) PHAIL.
can you stop trying to sound like some sixteen year old pls kthnxbye.
rachel would like to be:
1. more intellectual. as in, making use of it, i suppose, since i already have it it's just hidden underneath and i don't care to bring it out all that often. unless there's like some idiot (usually guy) in class trying to pose all brilliant and insightful and... generally coming off SMARMY. caterpillar goo and mashed up fat caterpillar legs for brain stuffing. then yeah, i bother using my smarts. but then again not really, i usually content myself with many mutterings in my (hidden) intellectual brain. like how i called said idiot caterpillar goo mashed up fat brain. well anyway i do like intelligence, you know, girls who use it turn me on. HAHAHHAHAA.
2. provocative. the last above sentence was for my best friend, who very firmly believes that homosexuality is Not For Rachel. but no, really, it's true. i guess i haven't seen many intelligent guys (or blogs i suppose since that's where i get my ideas from: smart girl = writes smart/about smart stuff like her essays and ideas and stuff like that); the smart ones are girls. so i have no choice but to admire it in girls right? okay okay. i shall narrow my definition. i like people who genuinely enjoy intellect/using it, and it shows in their conversation and personal writings. do i make sense? okay la evidently i'm not smart after all. rachel should just face her bimbotic self because that's the real her right. YOU KNOW I'M QUOTING FROM YOU. because i get this quite a lot. okay my point's been totally lost ggxx ttm. (epic) PHAIL.
can you stop trying to sound like some sixteen year old pls kthnxbye.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
pretty painted nails.
met the netballers tonight at clarke quay, where we talked and laughed.
we also finally settled for sure, how far each of us had went.
i feel weird, recalling this earlier evening where i divulged events that i have since come to regard as having happened in a past life. not past life as in the reincarnation sense (seeing how i believe myself very much in this same life and have been for the past 22 years), but past life in that a life i've turned my back on, and walked purposefully away.
so maybe i went to so many bases. and maybe i still did even recently. but if i've given up the batting life, does that mean my past sins still count? (not, that they were considered as such by the others.)
i don't think they do, seeing how the promise of a turning away, is a slate counted clean. and i know and can feel the change. my lifesong now sings it higher, better, brighter.
maybe what i'm feeling is discomfort. spilling details, even basic information, felt horridly distasteful. i kind of felt like i was gossiping over someone else. it really didn't feel nice.
well anyway i'm really tired. if i can recall any other points i'll come back and edit this.
//edited.
oh i remember now. i wanted to wonder aloud, if i should drop away and move off. but i don't think i should.
we also finally settled for sure, how far each of us had went.
i feel weird, recalling this earlier evening where i divulged events that i have since come to regard as having happened in a past life. not past life as in the reincarnation sense (seeing how i believe myself very much in this same life and have been for the past 22 years), but past life in that a life i've turned my back on, and walked purposefully away.
so maybe i went to so many bases. and maybe i still did even recently. but if i've given up the batting life, does that mean my past sins still count? (not, that they were considered as such by the others.)
i don't think they do, seeing how the promise of a turning away, is a slate counted clean. and i know and can feel the change. my lifesong now sings it higher, better, brighter.
maybe what i'm feeling is discomfort. spilling details, even basic information, felt horridly distasteful. i kind of felt like i was gossiping over someone else. it really didn't feel nice.
well anyway i'm really tired. if i can recall any other points i'll come back and edit this.
//edited.
oh i remember now. i wanted to wonder aloud, if i should drop away and move off. but i don't think i should.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Thursday, January 01, 2009
why i want to be back with gina
i guess i'm more concerned about whether a church stands for peace,
justice, reconciliation, redemption, and love for one another. how this is
expressed overflows to ppl in the church as well as to the community outside. if
cultural worldviews clash, you will need to be sensitive in how to challenge
that.
we can do our homework with regard to leviticus, before scriptures get
minquoted from various parts of the bible.
because no one else does it like she
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
i swear
1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Write down the phrase you hear
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Here I am send me.
(wtc)
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
When I fell to the dust
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Open my eyes open my eyes open my eyes
(HAHAHA)
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Search me
(enigma ttm!)
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Here I am
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Majesty
(hehehe)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Forgiven so that I can forgive
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Knowing that I'm Your desire
WHAT IS 2+2?
Scantified by glory and fire
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Since You laid down Your life
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
The greatest sacrifice
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Hosanna in the highest
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I see a generation
(feeling quite grandmotherly here)
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I see a near revival
(HAHHAA)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
We're on our knees
(I'm not that bad a daughter! honestly!)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Eternity
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Take- take- take it all! Take- take- take it all!
(haha i don't suppose anyone wants my remains as a souvenier)
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Everlasting
(i guess you could say that... let's hear it for His kingdom (: )
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
To love you from the inside out (:
WHAT´S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
You're altogether lovely
(I sense a jealous streak here..)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross.
(ouch. but imagine, if i did know, how much my life would be transformed)
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Oh I could be the man who grows old with you
(wah lao i sound like some disgruntled bitter spinster)
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
The one that you love
(what the crap??)
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Making love out of nothing at all
(??)
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Making love out of nothing at all
(I have a repeat song here. but still.)
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Lonely
(HAHAHAHAHHA)
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
If I ain't got you
(sigh)
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
I swear
(those words bring back too many gray, sad memories. if promises believed on, then forgotten by the promiser)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I swear
(another repeat!)
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Write down the phrase you hear
4. Tag 10 or more friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got it from.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Here I am send me.
(wtc)
WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
When I fell to the dust
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Open my eyes open my eyes open my eyes
(HAHAHA)
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Search me
(enigma ttm!)
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Here I am
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Majesty
(hehehe)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Forgiven so that I can forgive
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Knowing that I'm Your desire
WHAT IS 2+2?
Scantified by glory and fire
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Since You laid down Your life
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
The greatest sacrifice
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Hosanna in the highest
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I see a generation
(feeling quite grandmotherly here)
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
I see a near revival
(HAHHAA)
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
We're on our knees
(I'm not that bad a daughter! honestly!)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Eternity
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Take- take- take it all! Take- take- take it all!
(haha i don't suppose anyone wants my remains as a souvenier)
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Everlasting
(i guess you could say that... let's hear it for His kingdom (: )
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
To love you from the inside out (:
WHAT´S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
You're altogether lovely
(I sense a jealous streak here..)
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
I'll never know how much it cost to see my sin upon that cross.
(ouch. but imagine, if i did know, how much my life would be transformed)
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Oh I could be the man who grows old with you
(wah lao i sound like some disgruntled bitter spinster)
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
The one that you love
(what the crap??)
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Making love out of nothing at all
(??)
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Making love out of nothing at all
(I have a repeat song here. but still.)
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Lonely
(HAHAHAHAHHA)
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
If I ain't got you
(sigh)
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
I swear
(those words bring back too many gray, sad memories. if promises believed on, then forgotten by the promiser)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I swear
(another repeat!)
Sunday, December 07, 2008
off for camp.
such a different feeling from the previous years. i stumbled across a post; i think it's quite fitting. the voice from that time is calm and assured, secure in her knowledge that there is worth even in unsteady- and uneasiness, and it's the way these are lived, that counts.
i will remember grace, and strive to live a life that is bigger than i am.
such a different feeling from the previous years. i stumbled across a post; i think it's quite fitting. the voice from that time is calm and assured, secure in her knowledge that there is worth even in unsteady- and uneasiness, and it's the way these are lived, that counts.
i will remember grace, and strive to live a life that is bigger than i am.
because it seems an energy saving practice.
Today at 3:35pm
hullooo. i have a couple of hours before i have to start packing, so i thought i'd reply to you. it's a lazy sunday afternoon, and i am basically resting.
i'm kind of feeling too old for camps now, freelance or church camp or whatever. this one's church youth camp by the way.. there'll be overnight walks and stuff; i'm like, telling everyone that i'm too old for it. =Pp innotrek (the company i freelance at) has a camp during the first week of january for five days.. it'll be $300ish to earn, but i'm like, FIVE days of outdoor life. of.. having to match their energy level AND beat that, of talking and talking and talking, to entertain them, teach them... sleep late, wake up early, do chores and duties, andddddddd worse of all, deal with company politics. that's by far the worst. i hate politics. i don' really want to go, but the money will be useful in covering my mountain trip. did you know? i'll be climbing mt kinabalu in the 2nd week of january. go check out mt kinabalu on the map or sth hurrr. the cost will go up to $500 i think. so, yeah. =/
your hair looks like a st bernard.
i haven't really taken anything out from my luggage.. yuppppp, i haven't unpacked. sigh. i've been clearing out my clothes though. well i gave away like maybe 15% of my clothes but ermmm my mom got me heaps more while i was away SO there's effectively barely any difference. oh man. so terrible. i feel so ineffectual =((
so anyway no, i haven't touched the paua nor seen it- but i do think of that bag, and esp how they look like. thanks so much for lacquering and drilling holes into them. when i get down to settling my life's goods once more, i will examine them and i have no doubt i will be touched. i already am. (:
and are BOTH the twins going to hk! that is so uncool (from my point of view). okay fine i'll confess that if they don't come to singapore i don't really care where they go (as long as it's close to singapore. but then they might as well come to singapore then arghhh). you know what i mean right.
haha yay thanks for being proud of me. that's like, a super thing to say.
and i wouldn't know how to react if the twins saw you as their sister.
they are suchhhh lauyapoks at keeping in touch. i've given up on them.
erm i'm going to msia once for a family trip, and second time with a couple of mates. i don't know why, it's not like we always to over the causeway or sth but i just came back i'm entitled to do that. hah.
sigh. i'm super tired. i have been since i came back. i'm going to shower and nap, and then pack for camp. everything's so draining.. i seem to have lost all my energy.
hullooo. i have a couple of hours before i have to start packing, so i thought i'd reply to you. it's a lazy sunday afternoon, and i am basically resting.
i'm kind of feeling too old for camps now, freelance or church camp or whatever. this one's church youth camp by the way.. there'll be overnight walks and stuff; i'm like, telling everyone that i'm too old for it. =Pp innotrek (the company i freelance at) has a camp during the first week of january for five days.. it'll be $300ish to earn, but i'm like, FIVE days of outdoor life. of.. having to match their energy level AND beat that, of talking and talking and talking, to entertain them, teach them... sleep late, wake up early, do chores and duties, andddddddd worse of all, deal with company politics. that's by far the worst. i hate politics. i don' really want to go, but the money will be useful in covering my mountain trip. did you know? i'll be climbing mt kinabalu in the 2nd week of january. go check out mt kinabalu on the map or sth hurrr. the cost will go up to $500 i think. so, yeah. =/
your hair looks like a st bernard.
i haven't really taken anything out from my luggage.. yuppppp, i haven't unpacked. sigh. i've been clearing out my clothes though. well i gave away like maybe 15% of my clothes but ermmm my mom got me heaps more while i was away SO there's effectively barely any difference. oh man. so terrible. i feel so ineffectual =((
so anyway no, i haven't touched the paua nor seen it- but i do think of that bag, and esp how they look like. thanks so much for lacquering and drilling holes into them. when i get down to settling my life's goods once more, i will examine them and i have no doubt i will be touched. i already am. (:
and are BOTH the twins going to hk! that is so uncool (from my point of view). okay fine i'll confess that if they don't come to singapore i don't really care where they go (as long as it's close to singapore. but then they might as well come to singapore then arghhh). you know what i mean right.
haha yay thanks for being proud of me. that's like, a super thing to say.
and i wouldn't know how to react if the twins saw you as their sister.
they are suchhhh lauyapoks at keeping in touch. i've given up on them.
erm i'm going to msia once for a family trip, and second time with a couple of mates. i don't know why, it's not like we always to over the causeway or sth but i just came back i'm entitled to do that. hah.
sigh. i'm super tired. i have been since i came back. i'm going to shower and nap, and then pack for camp. everything's so draining.. i seem to have lost all my energy.
Thursday, December 04, 2008
is it always with a sense of betrayal?
my parents are so delighted, so gloriously happy, and i am unable to reciprocrate.
i feel like a traitor, for missing the mountains.
i feel like a traitor, for missing the mountains.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)